Are Your Beliefs Yours

“Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t… You’re Right!” – Henry Ford

What Are You Choosing To Believe

Everything that we want or strive for is within our grasp. It all comes down to our belief in whether we can do it, have it or be it. If we believe we can do something, we will do it. However, if we don’t believe we will accomplish that something, we won’t able to. That is what Henry Ford is saying in the quote above. It is all in what we believe. With that being said, what do you believe about your current situation? What do you believe about yourself? What do you believe can change?

The Reality About Beliefs

When we were toddlers, teenagers and even adults the people around us told us and showed us what to believe. Our parents, teachers, churches, partners and bosses conditioned us to believe what they were taught to believe. Take Santa for example, millions of children believed Santa came down the chimney and brought presents to all the good boys and girls. This belief was instilled in us all year round with reminders that Santa was watching. Then someone else told us Santa wasn’t real, which was when we no longer believed it.  All of our beliefs were learned. The point is, we can learn to believe whatever we chose and we can stop believing something that is not true. It is all up to what we decide to believe.

Creating Your Beliefs

Think about some of the things you have learned to believe, such as, girls play with dolls and boys play with trucks. Or we are told we are not athletic enough, pretty enough or smart enough for this sport or that job. Our quality of art, music and style is determined  by the people we surround ourselves with. Most don’t have the expertise to make that decision. And if they say we aren’t good enough, we believe it. But that is not our belief, it’s theirs. You have your own mind, your own dreams and your own ability to create your beliefs. What do you believe?

Learning Tips

In your journal, write about where you would like to be in five years. Explore your ideal job, relationship and view of yourself. What do you see? What would you need to believe in order to accomplish these levels of success? One of the tools used in Power Within Her, was to write down three beliefs about each of these areas and stated them in the present tense. (ex. I am lovable and loving). These statements are called affirmations. Repeat them to yourself (in the mirror) each morning and at bedtime. You will develop these beliefs and you will be what you believe. It just happens. Believe  it and you will achieve it!

Turn The Light On

Life Can Be Discouraging

I can remember walking around in the darkness of my own life. I had no idea who I was and was searching for something, but had no idea what I was looking for. During these years, I was lost. As I stated in my book, Power Within Her, I was “feeling alone in a house full of people”. There were so may times when I felt helpless and unsure of what tomorrow would bring. For a long time, it seemed  it would never get better. I would just keep going through the same thing, day in and day out. I was fortunate to have four children that depended on me. It forced me to keep going.  I have many stories of woe is me but instead, I will tell you that every day brought me closer into the light. I had to trust it would get better.

The Light At The End Of The Tunnel

Thinking back to the time when I had three babies in diapers, it makes me laugh. It seemed like I was changing diapers nonstop, around the clock and that it was never going to end. My second son who was more than two years old was finally potty trained (yahoo) and my third son followed very quickly after that. When it was only my daughter left in diapers and I remember saying to my sister, “I can finally see the light at the end of the diaper tunnel.”

I tell you this story because it’s the same with any challenging period in our lives. Our struggle or lack of knowing creates a feeling of never ending darkness. We can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel, so we are afraid to take the next step and we just stand still. These are the times when it is up to us to turn on the light, even if we have to create that light ourselves. Yes, it is hard but it is harder staying were we are with no chance of light coming in. At least if we keep going forward, we have a change of brighter days. They will be brighter!

How To Turn The Light On

We will continue to use our journals to explore who we are. This week we will be focusing on the life we would like to be living. If you could have the perfect life, what would you have? Who would be there with you? Think of what smells would you be smelling? The sounds would you be hearing? How would you be feeling? This is your opportunity to turn the light on to all of your dreams. Make it as detailed as possible. What are your relationships like? What do you do. How do you feel? Include the smell of the air, the taste of the wine, or warmth of the coffee. Let your imagination run wild. If you had all the time, money and ability what would that look like to you?   ~ Together we share, learn and grow ~

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Meaningful Mondays

We Can’t Fight The Changing Season

Let’s talk about the need for change and why change is so hard for us, even when we want it. Fall is a great time to explore change. It is a busy time, yet it is also a time for slowing down.  The leaves are changing colors, the animals gather food and create their homes, beginning their hibernation. Everything around us is changing and we adjust as it happens. It’s a natural process. For us personally, change is something quite different. It’s about willingly going into the unfamiliar. There is a feeling of safety in what we know even if it’s not good for us.

Change Needs To Happen Within Us

Let’s think about that… if we live in a state that we are unhappy with, long for something better but fear the idea of change, we willingly accept to remain unhappy. We actually choose it. It’s like putting ourselves in prison or worse, in a grave. Because if we continue to live a life we are not happy with or we stay in an abusive relationship (physical or mental) we are actually not living at all. We are allowing someone else to dictate the terms of our life, forcing us to live according to their will and not our own.

What we fail to see is the fact that change happens within us as we begin to ask questions like… Now what? Where do I go from here? What do I want? What did I say I would do but didn’t do? Why haven’t I left? Our minds begin to turn muddy with thoughts of the lack of progress. We suddenly begin to experience feelings of sadness or emptiness. We are in a process of change and with change comes the opportunity for learning. These learning moments accumulate and act as building blocks, eventually creating the foundation of our new found strength. This is the time of year when everything around us begins to change but it is also the time for us to create change.

Opportunity

The change is already happening in you. With the silence of Fall comes the space and time to look inward. We can take this season and make it work for us. When we spend the time exploring who and what we are, we bring ourselves to the core of what makes everything happen. We learn about, nurture and begin to love who we are. Fall brings the time for connection to ourselves. It is not the end of the summer, it’s the beginning of our next year to come.  The trees do not die in the fall, nor do they stop growing. They merely draw inward, nurture their roots and protect themselves as they ready for new growth.

Tips To Embrace The Season Of Change

As stated in my book, Power Within Her, the first step in making change is learning about who you are. The first tool you will need is a journal. If you don’t have a journal already, go get one!

This week, we will spend time writing about who we are, what is important to you and what makes us happy. It might sound unusual to start off this way but it is so important for us to know WHO we are before we begin to figure out WHAT we want. On the first day of the week write everything that comes to your mind that explains who you are. From there write about all the things that you don’t like and all of the things that make you happy or put a smile on your face. I call this step, becoming your new best friend. The way you develop a new best friend is by learning about them. What is their favorite song, color, holiday, etc. It’s time to spend time with you and really get to know who you are. Go for walks, garden, paint… just be with you and document all of your discoveries. Listen to your heart & enjoy your week.

Till next time…

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